Sports Bar, Bro

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Shawn Muholland, co-owner of Williamsburg’s lone sports bar Muholland’s, spoke with Gothamist about gettin’ drunk with hipsters, gettin’ drunk on Saturdays in the rain, and the one time he saw a drunk chick shit on a bar.

It was packed, I mean you couldn’t move at all, and a female customer took a shit… while standing at the bar. True story!

Natch this wasn’t at Muholland’s, but at another bar, probably the one featured in Michael Cera’s Infinite Stroll Around New York. But, Muholland’s really does deserve some credit as the lone outpost of testosterone in a battlefield of irony-plagued liquor establishments. It’s too literal of a sports bar for non-sports loving hipsters to go there to hilariously wear Yankees shirts, only to ironically get drunk and then get wings just to smile and laugh at the fact that they’re drunk and getting wings at a sports bar. So Muholland’s, hats off to ya. It takes a bro to stand amongst the brahs.

Time Chronicles Hipsters, Misidentifies Breeding Grounds

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Time published “A Brief History of Hipsters” today, because we all need that, and captioned the above Getty photo of people tossing water balloons in McCarren with, “Hipsters participate in a water balloon toss as they try and beat the heat at Tom Stofka Garden park in the Williamsburg neighborhood of the Brooklyn borough of New York City.” Oops! What’s that about?
In fact, Tom Stofka Garden is the beautiful memorial garden at the park’s Driggs Avenue entrance, named for the deceased former Director of Brooklyn Forestry, Tom Stofka. He helped get the city’s first tree census off the ground, among many other wonderful things.
Anyways, they talk about this whole problem everyone’s having with moniez and how it affects everyone in W’burg…

The hip have been hit with a double whammy of economic reality ‚Äî more are struggling to pay the rent as parental support dries up, and their carefully gentrified neighborhood is gradually being infiltrated by squatters inhabiting Williamsburg’s stalled building projects. Hipsterdom’s largest natural habitat, it seems, is under threat.

TIME
Update: They fixed it to read, “New York hipsters participate in a water-balloon toss at Tom Stofka Garden in McCarren Park in Williamsburg, Brooklyn,” which is STILL wrong. They aren’t in the freakin’ garden. Sheesh.
Update 2: TimeHipsterGate is over. Everybody go home. It now correctly reads, “New York hipsters participate in a water-balloon toss at McCarren Park in Williamsburg, Brooklyn.”

Hipster Foldables: The Gutter Punk

gutterpunk_illus.jpgOur third Hipster Foldable, has arrived and now we have to fumigate. It’s the Gutter Punk. As you’ve undoubtedly noticed, they’ve invaded the ‘burg and now we can expect a surge in lyme disease from the ticks festering in their nasty-ass beards.
In case you missed the story in the Daily News, here it is:

Heroin-addict hobos from around the country are overrunning hipster haven Williamsburg – living in stalled luxury condo projects in the trendy Brooklyn neighborhood. The squatters, from middle-class families, hop freight trains to the city, where they can earn up to $150 a day panhandling in Manhattan. At night, like plenty of other borough commuters, they return to their homes: grubby hideaways inside boarded-up lots that pock the once-booming neighborhood.
“I’ve got to sleep somewhere, and I might as well do it in Williamsburg,” said Stuart, 22, a Florida college dropout.
The admitted alcoholic and heroin user makes $15 an hour panhandling in Union Square, holding a sign that reads “Traveling Broke and Sexy.”
“The girls here like it that I’m dirty and I ride trains,” he added.
The vagrants – who also call themselves “crusty punks” – swarmed into Williamsburg this spring, drawn by open-minded young people and vacant lots.
Packs of punks and their mangy dogs clog Bedford Ave. in the evenings. They sprawl drunkenly on the sidewalk and heckle hipsters for money and cigarettes.
“There’s a big crowd of us here,” said Sethry, 20, of Portland, Ore., lounging near North Ninth St. one recent night. “Every night it’s a party with all our friends.”

As we suggested before, don’t give them money. Instead, use this much more sanitary, stench-free bank and save for your own future.
Instructions:
1. Download the Gutter Punk foldable here (.pdf)
2. Print
3. Cut along black solid lines
4. Fold along dotted lines and tape, as instructed
Thanks again to Bryan. And remember, send us photos for future foldables! We want to feature local celebrities—who doesn’t want a Todd P foldable? Or perhaps the creepy pastor on Bedford, if we ever muster the courage to approach him.
DOWNLOAD THE GUTTER PUNK FOLDABLE PDF HERE
Previously:
The Hipster Grifter
Hip Kyp Malone

The Gutter Punks Have Arrived!

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Now that Williamsburg has turned into a post-apocalyptic-halted-condo-construction wasteland it’s attracting a nasty infestation: Gutter Punks. From The Daily News [via]:

Heroin-addict hobos from around the country are overrunning hipster haven Williamsburg – living in stalled luxury condo projects in the trendy Brooklyn neighborhood.
The squatters, from middle-class families, hop freight trains to the city, where they can earn up to $150 a day panhandling in Manhattan. At night, like plenty of other borough commuters, they return to their homes: grubby hideaways inside boarded-up lots that pock the once-booming neighborhood.
“I’ve got to sleep somewhere, and I might as well do it in Williamsburg,” said Stuart, 22, a Florida college dropout.
The admitted alcoholic and heroin user makes $15 an hour panhandling in Union Square, holding a sign that reads “Traveling Broke and Sexy.”
“The girls here like it that I’m dirty and I ride trains,” he added.
The vagrants – who also call themselves “crusty punks” – swarmed into Williamsburg this spring, drawn by open-minded young people and vacant lots.
Packs of punks and their mangy dogs clog Bedford Ave. in the evenings. They sprawl drunkenly on the sidewalk and heckle hipsters for money and cigarettes.
“There’s a big crowd of us here,” said Sethry, 20, of Portland, Ore., lounging near North Ninth St. one recent night. “Every night it’s a party with all our friends.”

Ew. Can we fumigate? Given the excess of crusty-ass beards and plaid in the neighborhood, it’s no wonder they feel at home.
Williamsboard has a huge thread on this nasty phenomenon.
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Williamsburg’s very own Gutter Punks, “BB Guns” (l.) and “Robert” (r.): If you see these two don’t give them money and, it should go without saying, but don’t give them sex either.

The Wall Street Journal Stumbles Upon A Wacky New Trend: Skinny Jeans

Okay. Now that someone’s grandfather over at the WSJ has discovered this wacky new trend, can we officially agree that skinny jeans are pass√© and start phasing them out?

Explanations abound for why men would want to wear jeans that look so uncomfortable and impractical. Some fashion observers say skinny jeans’ hold on certain men stems in part from the wearers’ desire to show off their gym-sculpted bodies. […]
The brands also hope the changes will make their skinny jeans appeal beyond the urban hipsters, skater-types, rockers and hip-hop fans who already wear them to men with meatier legs. “I’m an avid cyclist and need to have more room in my jeans because my quads are getting worked on so much,” says Michael Ball, co-founder of premium denim brand Rock & Republic, which late last year added stretch to its men’s skinny jeans […]
Though the jeans may be getting easier to wear, the look isn’t easy to pull off. The trick is to wear skinny jeans with slim-fitting shirts and pointy-toed dress shoes or dressy boots. Any squarish, loose or, worse still, boxy-fit sweater or shirt can make a man’s proportions look out of whack and his legs way too skinny.

Bringing Back Summers Past

Over at the L Mag, they’re feeling nostalgic. Even I have been sucked into thinking about the past. So, I’ve decided to do some bringin’ it back a la Pomp & Circumstance. Starting with the video that kicked off the summer of ’08, before quickly disappearing (but definitely not before starting some Royal Oak style rooftop foot stomping), sorta like this year’s (more lo-fi) tribute to a tribute. Thing is, it’s still relevant, especially for those of you that are getting out of the city this weekend… Unlike those other summer kick off princes, MGMT.

Check out some been there, done thats that are oh-so-last summer after the jump.

[Read more…]

Look at This F*cking Hipster Basher

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I’ve got a new piece over at The Morning News. I’d sworn off writing about hipsters, but got sucked back in by all the rage they still evoke. Here’s a taste.

You get the sense that if Jimi Hendrix were to show up in Echo Park today, he’d be publicly mocked in a style section piece on blipsters for wearing a feathered fedora. Duchamp would have given up as soon as he appeared on dadaist-or-douchebag.com. And Warhol would be demonized as a hipster gentrifier for setting up his factory in a Brooklyn warehouse. Critics continue to complain that we live in an era where all art is derivative and devoid of substance. But if Hendrix, Duchamp, or Warhol were alive today, we’d be doing our damnedest to derail their self-expression, dismissing them as fucking hipsters.

You can read it all here. Image via.

Williamsburgers Not All Trustafarians

New York has written a researched rebuttal to the Times’ piece Parents Pulling the Plug on Williamsburg Trust-Funders. Turns out we’re not all trust-funders…. a fact that I’m all too well aware of:

The median income for the area in the last twelve months was $39,663, well below the city median of $48,631. In 2007, 38.3 percent of residents in the 11211 Zip Code were below the poverty level […]
Local soup kitchens and food pantries are overwhelmed. ‚”We’re serving 200 people a week,” says Ann Kansfield, pastor at the Greenpoint Reform Church and the head of the Greenpoint Interfaith Food Team, which serves both Greenpoint and Williamsburg. ‚”Where are these trust-funders? I want them to give us money!”
There’s probably a reason the trustafarians are so elusive: In the last twelve months only about 2.9 percent of Williamsburg households made over $200,000 annually. The reality of Williamsburg, beyond the mythical trust-funders, is that it is a community of people mostly struggling to get by, with a few wealthy residents grabbing headlines ‚Äî the way New York has always been.