Snowstorm Stella ’bout to shake shit up

VIA NEW YORK DAILY NEWS BY MARY ALTAFFER FOR AP

VIA NEW YORK DAILY NEWS BY MARY ALTAFFER FOR AP

It may be mid-March, but winter is about to wave a big ‘ol middle finger at us.

With a projected possible 20 inches of snow, Snowstorm Stella intends to have very little mercy on us responsibility-ridden New Yorkers. Yes, the lucky kiddos get to stay home from school (Mayor DeBlasio announced today that all NYC public schools will be closed tomorrow) but for you, it ain’t first grade anymore. You have to bring home the bacon. You have bills to pay, mouths (or just one mouth) to feed, concert merch to buy. You (probably) don’t have the luxury of taking the day off just because the weather feels bitchy. Our point is— if you do have to work tomorrow, we’re very sorry.

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If you are a part of the working dead tomorrow, we just ask this one thing of you: please, in order to avoid the dangerous conditions outside, work from home if you are able to do so. Stella has been dubbed a “potentially crippling nor’easter” and will most likely be the worst storm we have had this season.

Light snow kicks off tonight and will intensify into Tuesday morning. NBC reports:

The heftiest snowfall is expected to blanket the East on Tuesday morning, holding steady through the afternoon, with snowfall rates of as much as 2 to 4 inches an hour. And when the snow combines with wind gusts of 55 to 70 mph, things could get messy — possible power outages, falling trees, and traffic mishaps.

Free up some time today to grab all the supplies you will need for tomorrow including flashlights, batteries, water, bread, eggs, cereal, beer, whiskey, and whatever other food you fux with.

In short, all you have to do to survive the storm is drink. Cheers, bitches.

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