Our third Hipster Foldable, has arrived and now we have to fumigate. It’s the Gutter Punk. As you’ve undoubtedly noticed, they’ve invaded the ‘burg and now we can expect a surge in lyme disease from the ticks festering in their nasty-ass beards.
In case you missed the story in the Daily News, here it is:
Heroin-addict hobos from around the country are overrunning hipster haven Williamsburg – living in stalled luxury condo projects in the trendy Brooklyn neighborhood. The squatters, from middle-class families, hop freight trains to the city, where they can earn up to $150 a day panhandling in Manhattan. At night, like plenty of other borough commuters, they return to their homes: grubby hideaways inside boarded-up lots that pock the once-booming neighborhood.
“I’ve got to sleep somewhere, and I might as well do it in Williamsburg,” said Stuart, 22, a Florida college dropout.
The admitted alcoholic and heroin user makes $15 an hour panhandling in Union Square, holding a sign that reads “Traveling Broke and Sexy.”
“The girls here like it that I’m dirty and I ride trains,” he added.
The vagrants – who also call themselves “crusty punks” – swarmed into Williamsburg this spring, drawn by open-minded young people and vacant lots.
Packs of punks and their mangy dogs clog Bedford Ave. in the evenings. They sprawl drunkenly on the sidewalk and heckle hipsters for money and cigarettes.
“There’s a big crowd of us here,” said Sethry, 20, of Portland, Ore., lounging near North Ninth St. one recent night. “Every night it’s a party with all our friends.”
As we suggested before, don’t give them money. Instead, use this much more sanitary, stench-free bank and save for your own future.
1. Download the Gutter Punk foldable here (.pdf)
3. Cut along black solid lines
4. Fold along dotted lines and tape, as instructed
Thanks again to Bryan. And remember, send us photos for future foldables! We want to feature local celebrities—who doesn’t want a Todd P foldable? Or perhaps the creepy pastor on Bedford, if we ever muster the courage to approach him.
DOWNLOAD THE GUTTER PUNK FOLDABLE PDF HERE
The Hipster Grifter
Hip Kyp Malone