It’s hard not to be captivated by Gnome Life, a Tumblr documenting the urban adventures of an anonymous gnome living in New York. The artful composition of the Gnome’s photos, paired with his candid and often poignant musings about the city, are enough to pique anyone’s curiosity, but the identity and whereabouts of the Gnome remain shrouded in mystery. So it came somewhat as a surprise when the Gnome agreed to a rare interview with Free Williamsburg — but only under the condition that the details of his life remain anonymous.
And so, without further ado, an interview with New York’s most famous Gnome:
I live in Manhattan. In New York, I am surrounded by so many people, but there are still mornings, whole afternoons, where I feel alone. I am most taken by the sheer amount of people and the energy that grabs you.
When I came here, I remember I would fight against New York, for myself. Now, I know it is always better to play along with the city. At this point, I am happy I left the garden for this place. I love it for its differences not despite them.
What’s your favorite breakfast food?
I make sure to always eat something green for breakfast, and follow it with yellow, or something orange in a pinch. It’s more about the colors than the food, really.
Do you have any hidden talents?
I feel that many of my talents are hidden. Some of my talents have ceased to be talents. For example, in the garden I was one of the best climbers, and sure, I’m still a talented climber, but in New York does this really matter?
I almost never go to the same place twice. For both aesthetics and safety reasons.
Do you have a favorite beverage?
I had coffee for the first time awhile ago, and WOW. Gnomes don’t usually drink coffee (small hearts), so I have to be careful. But coffee makes keeping up with this city easier.
Tell us about your feelings on New York City’s dating scene.
The journey, my journey is limited to one thus far. I wouldn’t even know where to begin.
You’ve garnered a lot of feminine attention thanks to your Tumblr. What qualities do you look for in a romantic interest?
I think the biggest question facing me is whether or not she will be a gnome. Will I return to the garden and choose somebody that looks like me, or find a NYC girl. Either way, she will be lovely in all the right ways and she will love me.
Who takes your photo?
My photographer’s talent is only matched by his anonymity.
You’ve shown us many instances where your appearance makes life in the city more of a struggle. Are there any perks to gnomedom in New York?
Overwhelmingly, it is harder looking so different, but sometimes I see a child and they smile, this is wonderful. Also, no one hands me fliers.