The March 2008 Movie Preview

by Dave Thomas
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Nick Stahl and Charlize Theron in Sleepwalking
After last March gave us 300 and Zodiac, this year’s take on the month feels like kind of a let-down.
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March 7
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CJ7
WHAT’S THE PITCH?
Stephen Chow’s E.T.
WILL IT SUCK?
Early buzz is mixed. I think people were expecting more from the writer/director/star of Kung Fu Hustle.
HOW WELL WILL IT DO?
Needs more aggressive marketing. I loved Kung Fu Hustle and I had no idea this was coming out. $3mil.
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COLLEGE ROAD TRIP
WHAT’S THE PITCH?
Martin Lawrence Vehicle
WILL IT SUCK?
Didn’t we just get over a Martin Lawrence film? From the director of Cruel Intentions (the cream of his crop) and writers behind Bubble Boy and Santa Clause 2. Looks to be this year’s RV.
HOW WELL WILL IT DO?
Probably no better or worse than that last Lawrence outing. $31mil.
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10,000 B.C.
WHAT’S THE PITCH?
Remember that movie Caveman with Ringo Starr? Okay, what if we were asked to take that seriously?

[Read more…]

Larry David On Hillary's Red Phone

This is hilarious. From HuffPost

Here’s an idea for an Obama ad: a montage of Clinton’s Sybillish personalities that have surfaced during the campaign with a solemn voiceover at the end saying, “Does anyone want this nut answering the phone?”
How is it that she became the one who’s perceived as more equipped to answer that 3 a.m. call than the unflappable Obama? He, with the ice in his veins, who doesn’t panic when he’s losing or get too giddy when he’s winning, who’s as comfortable in his own skin as she’s uncomfortable in hers. There have been times in this campaign when she seemed so unhinged that I worried she’d actually kill herself if she lost. Every day, she reminds me more and more of Adele H., who also had an obsession that drove her insane.
A few weeks ago, I started to feel sorry for her. Oh Christ, let her win already…Who cares…It’s not worth it. There’s not that much difference between them. She can have it. Anything to avoid watching her descend into madness. So I switched. I started rooting for her. It wasn’t that hard. Compromise comes easy to me. I was on board.
And then I saw the ad.
I watched, transfixed, as she took the 3 a.m. call…and I was afraid…very afraid. Suddenly, I realized the last thing this country needs is that woman anywhere near a phone. I don’t care if it’s 3 a.m. or 10 p.m. or any other time. I don’t want her talking to Putin, I don’t want her talking to Kim Jong Il, I don’t want her talking to my nephew. She needs a long rest. She needs to put on a sarong and some sun block and get away from things for a while, a nice beach somewhere — somewhere far away, where there are…no phones.

Newsweek: Hillary Is Even Further Behind After Tuesday

We can only hope this is true. From Newsweek

To beat Barack Obama among pledged delegates, Clinton now needs even bigger margins in the 12 remaining primaries than she needed when I ran the numbers on Monday–an average of 23 points, which is more than double what she received in Ohio. Superdelegates won’t help Clinton if she cannot erase Obama’s lead among pledged delegates, which now stands at roughly 134. Caucus results from Texas aren’t complete, but Clinton will probably net about 10 delegates out of March 4. That’s 10 down, 134 to go. Good luck.
I’ve asked several prominent uncommitted superdelegates if there’s any chance they would reverse the will of Democratic voters. They all say no. It would shatter young people and destroy the party.
Clinton’s only hope lies in the popular vote–a yardstick on which she now trails Obama by about 600,000 votes. Should she end the primary season in June with a lead in popular votes, she could get a hearing from uncommitted superdelegates for all the other arguments that she would make a stronger nominee (wins the big states, etc.). If she loses both the pledged delegate count and the popular vote, no argument will cause the superdelegates to disenfranchise millions of Democratic voters. It will be over.

On another note, a Republican friend of the site who lives in the South (and is often our barometer for all things GOP) has this to say about Hillary’s electability:

“Nothing mobilizes Republicans to get out and support a candidate that they are lukewarm about more than a Clinton. The Republican direct mail people are salivating at the thought. The RNC is clearing out space in its bank account to make room for the money. R’s just have a natural reaction against her and we cringe. Kind of like when you burp and throw up a little in your mouth. It is the same.”

Funny, we feel that way too.

Garfied Minus Garfield

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Thanks for the tip, Ron:

Who would have guessed that when you remove Garfield from the Garfield comic strips, the result is an even better comic about schizophrenia, bipolor disorder, and the empty desperation of modern life?

Read ’em all here.

Since People Clearly Need A Reminder…

Hillary sucks.

Mastodon's Brooklyn Masonic Temple Shows: Part One

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From the Mastodon website: “this is the first in a series of 4 videos from Mastodon’s shows with Neurosis at the Brooklyn Masonic Temple at the end of January.” Watch the video after the jump. [hat tip Brooklyn Vegan]

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Italian Spiderman

Clinton Sets Up Camp In Restroom

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We’re not making this up. From Time via Rumproast:

This has got to be a first. Here in Austin, on the night before that make-or-break Texas primary, the Clinton campaign has set up a filing center for the traveling press corps… in a men’s room. Insert metaphor here

Rumproast has the whole story.